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Lately, I’ve been struggling with motivation, or shall I clarify, lack of motivation.
Case in point, I’ve had 3 DM posts worth of images “stuck” on my camera for about 3 days- I’m simply too lazy to get up off the couch and get the cord and actually open my editing program. We’re talking about maybe a 10 minute time investment, I just simply don’t wanna.
Do I feel like a toddler when I say that term? You betcha!
This laziness and lack of motivation has traveled on to some other items, such as sweeping regularly, or vacuuming as often as I once did. For example, this is the dirt pile that I had to take a picture of and blast to the world wide web:

Do you want to know what actually pushed me over the edge to finally get up and sweep my mess? I got attacked by a furball. Seriously. I turned on the overhead fan and a 4″ sized hairball assaulted my face.
Friends, I have a very strict cleaning schedule, normally. It includes sweeping and vacuuming at least 3 times a week (which may seem a bit overboard, but we have 2 dogs.) For my house to go a week? In my book, it was unsanitary.
I’m just very lucky that it’s way cheaper for Eli to keep me around, rather than upgrading at this point.
Do you have a confession? Link up!

I have a hard time distinguishing the difference between a necessity, and a want. Having had a two income family for most of our married life it’s only been since recently that I’ve had to be more conscious of differentiating between the two. When I quit my job to stay at home with Vivien, it made sense financially on paper. My non-profit job didn’t pay me enough to justify the exorbitant price of full time childcare in Northern California. Moving to Colorado was the solution, and we were quickly able to purchase our first home and survive off one income.
But that home that we purchased? Well, it was built in 1984. It has many “charms” that come alongside of a dated home, such as popcorn ceiling throughout the entire house, a poorly homemade finished basement with a host of problems, a weird dropped ceiling in the kitchen area, and the list goes on.
See the drop? (Note: not our furniture. These photos were taken during the home inspection when we purchased the home.)
The doozy during about 5 months out of the year though, is the lack of air conditioning. We survived last summer off of a window unit in our bedroom, and lots of fans throughout the house. When “Spring” finally arrived this year, it came in like a lion bringing 90 degree weather. The house is stuffy, and the upstairs (Vivien’s bedroom, specifically) is dreadful. (Think 85 degrees during her mid-day nap.)
We got a few quotes on having a company come install central AC, and both were between $4,000 and $5,000. Remember how I said that we’re a one income (for the most part, I do work currently but it’s nothing substantial) family? That just wasn’t possible or feasible.
But I believe that blessings come to those who wait, and have faith. The other day, Eli called and a friend that he works with used to install air conditioners, and offered to put one in our home, for 1/4 of the original quoted price.
Sometimes, I get a swift kick in the butt, reminding me that good things come to those people who wait, and jumping the gun prematurely doesn’t always pay off in the long run.
Last week, I got schooled in patience, but in a weird, unexpected way.


*Sidenote, I am actually 11 weeks right now but I’ve been lazy and sitting on this post for the past 5 days. So you’ll get two updates this weekend*
Baby is the size of a: kumquat
As I am almost out of my 10th week, I can say that this week was a weird mixture. I have days that I feel phenomenal, and days that I am very ill. The weather has been amazing, which I think really attributes to my mood, because Vivien and I are able to go outside, and I’ve been able to clear my mind a bit. The trees are sprouting leaves, my windows are open all day and night, and I am busy cherishing the moments of just Vivien and I.
Symptoms:
- Morning sickness. The zofran helps quite a bit.
- Exhaustion. All day.
- Heartburn. All day, everyday.
A quick family photo I was able to snap on Mother’s Day. I need to get better at hiding the remote for my camera.
Highlights of the week:
This past Sunday was Mother’s Day, and it was so nice to be able to go out to eat as a family. We spent the afternoon tarping off the basement bedroom, as we (ok, Eli is) in the middle of basement renovation. We have 4 bedrooms upstairs, however, one of the rooms is relatively small and is currently being used as Eli’s office. The plan is to move the guest bedroom into the basement bedroom, which has been empty and in need of renovations since we moved in. The upstairs guest bedroom will become 2.0′s room! I can’t wait to find out the gender and start planning!
I was also able to locate a used Arm’s Reach Co-Sleeper on Craigslist, to the tune of a $20 price tag. I wished that we had one of these with Vivien, as nursing at night time would have been much easier. Since it’s the original co-sleeper, it also transforms into a bassinet or playpen, so it’s a pretty useful piece of equipment.
Maternity Stuff:
I am officially wearing my maternity pants. Womp Womp. Shirts seem to fit okay, except many times aren’t long enough to cover the panel. I need to go shopping for a few more staples, but I’ll probably hold out a while longer.
Gender:
No idea! I am planning on scheduling an ultrasound for when my Mom is in town from Michigan. I’ll be around 16ish weeks, so it will be perfect! (Hopefully) I am still leaning towards boy, BUT, I wouldn’t be surprised if they say girl.
Age of sibling:
Almost 19 months. They will be around 25 months apart.
Next Appointment:
Next Thursday, for the first trimester ultrasound and screening.
Photo:
I’m seriously about giving up on this one. Seriously people, I TRIED to take a “belly shot” but honestly, I looked like a fattie slob. I don’t think I actually started taking photos with Vivien until I was like 16 weeks, and even then, I did it monthly. I want to be a good pregnant blogger, and show you amazing images, but I just can’t. Not without losing my dignity.

Hey everyone, welcome to another week of Mommy Confessions!
You guys, as a single, childless person, I used to speak about the demise of family interaction, and how technology is ruining children’s lives. Everywhere you go, you see a kid playing an iPad game, or scrolling on their parent’s phone.
“What luxury!” I thought. “Do these kids have their OWN iPads?!” I wondered.
Well, on Sunday evening (Mother’s Day) we decided to go to an actual slightly classy (Ok, it was PF Changs. But, it wasn’t like, IHOP!) restaurant together as a family. However, taking a toddler to a restaurant is becoming a tad bit more difficult. She’s grabby, she wants to get down and run amok, the list goes on! She’s not bad, per-say, it’s just hard. (On us, not her)
Enter, the trusty friend:

To be fair, this particular picture was taken at work, but you get the point. The Kindle Fire. The kid will sit still and watch Elmo (on mute!) for the entire 57 minutes. Friends, the kid is zoned out, and she won’t make a peep. I swear to you, at some point on Sunday, it was almost like Eli and I were still dating (except for a few demands of “mo miiiiilk!”) It was quiet, and we had conversation.
Now, I look at those kids playing on technology differently. In fact, I prefer to look at the parents instead. They look content, and productive.
Was I getting judged at dinner? Maybe. But I can guarantee they’d hate us way more if Vivien was pitching a fit, or running around like a crazy person.
Donations are now being accepted for Vivien’s very own Kindle for her 2nd birthday. (Kidding!)

“I wish I could have the same relationship with my daughter, that I had with my mother.”
Those words will never be spoken from my mouth. Truth be told, I hope for the opposite. Before you get the wrong impression- let me back way up.
You see, I like to compare my relationship with my Mom to a long, winding road. I would rather forget the first part of that road, also known as my childhood and teen years.
I hope that my daughter doesn’t spend her teenage years immersed in lies and rebellion like I did, and pray that, if tested, I demonstrate half of the amount of poise, determination, and unconditional love that my mother once showed me.

It took me 20-something years to appreciate my Mom for all her worth. I finally grew up, and realized that she has been my incessant cheerleader since day one; I was just too stubborn to recognize it.
Remember when I mentioned the metaphorical winding road? Luckily, it didn’t dead end at my high school graduation. It kept going, and kept getting better, and smoother. And for that, I am so thankful.
As I celebrate my second year of celebrating Mother’s Day as a Mom myself, I can’t help but wish to continue aiming to be the kind of mother that she was to me. It doesn’t get any better than that, friends. I also wish that it doesn’t take Vivien a couple decades to appreciate it- because I know that I definitely regret not being my Mom’s friend all along.
My Mom is top notch, and I’ve got so much to learn. And guess what? She’s still behind me, every step of the way, praising my choices and praying for my future. That makes me the luckiest wayward daughter in the world.
To my Mom, my friend, and my daily inspiration- Happy Mother’s Day! I love you.
~*~
PS: I may, or may not, have ugly cried throughout writing this post. If you don’t know the term “ugly cry,” here’s a fun visual:

Have I ever mentioned that I also inherited my wit and sarcasm from my Mom? True story.

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